The Good, the bad, and the ugly

Where do I even begin today? I have actually been sitting in front of my computer for over an hour now, trying to think about what I should type. I have started typing multiple times only to come back, delete it, and start over again I'm not sure why, but maybe it's because this seems so permanent. It's like a record of my day, that can't be changed, or redone. I feel like once I hit publish, it's history. Yes, I know I can go back and edit, but I'm talking 30 days from now, this is going to be my account of Thursday August 13. On December 22, this most likely is going to be my only recollection of today, and I will relive this day, based on my blog post tonight. I make it sound like something monumental or tragic happened, but it didn't. In fact, nothing out of the ordinary really happened today. There was indeed some good, some bad and some ugly.

I started out today with the best intentions of course. I slept like a baby last night, and woke up pretty alert. I grabbed my breakfast, and left for work. I ate a my cereal for breakfast, then a bar, drank lots of coffee, and tons of water, and realized that I was in a predicament for lunch. I forgot to bring something, and I didn't feel like going out to subway, because that always seems to be an event, and I didn't want to cave and get fast food. Any rational person, would have just sucked it up and went to subway, but not me. Then again, who says I'm rational? I had the brilliant thought that since I was going out to dinner tonight with the girls, that I would skip lunch since I forgot it anyway, and just eat dinner.

We went to On the Border for dinner, and I ordered off of the smart menu, and got the chicken salsa fresca, with grilled veggies and rice. I only ate about half of my meal, because we were getting dessert. Yes, that's horrible, but it was oh so good. I ordered these cinnamon things that tasted like a soft elephant ear. So yum. I only ate half, so that was an improvement, and I would have been ok for the day, because of my lack of calories during the day, but of course I didn't stop. I actually beat my husband home, because he was working late, and as soon as he got home he presents me with a vanilla milkshake. Grrrrrrr why did I drink it. I drank it of course, and then to top it off I had a few twizzlers. My whole evening encompasses the ugly of my day. I had a blast with my friends, but I should have been stronger.

I think part of my problem that I had waited soo long to eat that I was soooooo hungry. Bad idea. Tomorrow is a new day, right now is a new minute. The good thing is that I'm really not phased by tonight. I don't feel like I might as well just eat whatever, and not exercise tomorrow. I just feel like I need to get in an excellent workout, burn major calories, and eat as best as I can.

I do have a lunch scheduled with some friends tomorrow at Olive Garden, but that's ok, I can handle it. I can do this.

It's so funny that i want so hard to do this right now, and now is the time that I have all of these girl's night out, lunches, and social stuff planned. I love it though. I don't know what I would do without my friends. They make me laugh, feel loved, and we have a blast. I have never experienced such great friendships as I have lately, and they are stronger than ever. The only reason that I bring this up, is that I think this happiness will carryover into my getting healthy plan. My friends will help me through this. I know that I have to do it myself, but it's great knowing that I have people supporting me. I feel lucky.

Again, I'm babbling and not making much sense, because I am sooooo sleepy. I am off to bed.

Until tomorrow...